Wednesday, March 2, 2011

So Much Crazy, So Little Time

It's only Wednesday, and Hollywood has officially gone crazy this week.  First, Charlie Sheen has traded his cocaine and alcohol bender for a media bender.  Since last week's radio interview where he trashed the producer of Two and Half Men, he has been whoring himself out to every single media outlet in the country, including reputable news stations like ABC and NBC.  In case you haven't seen any of the interviews, I highly recommend sitting down at your computer with a bucket of popcorn and googling it.  So far, I have a few favorites that represent Charlie's brand of crazy: 

1.   "I am on a drug, it's called Charlie Sheen. It's not available, 'cause if you try it once, you will die. Your face will melt off and your children will weep over your exploded body." (from his 20/20 interview)  

2.  "I'm underpaid right now, sure. ... I'm tired of pretending like I'm not special. I'm tired of pretending like I'm not bitching, a total frickin' rock star from Mars. People can't figure me out, they can't process me. I don't expect them to. You can't process me with a normal brain." (from his Today show interview)

3.  "I'm bi-winning. I win here and I win there. Now what? If I'm bipolar, aren't there moments where a guy like crashes in the corner like, 'Oh my God, it's all my mom's fault!' Shut up! Shut up! Stop! Move forward."  (when asked if he was bipolar)

Well, I'll agree with Charlie on one point - he is certainly special.  If this is Charlie sober, I'm going to start a collection for cocaine and hookers to mellow him out.  

Next, Christina Aguilera and her new man get arrested and sit in jail overnight because they are both too drunk to go home or take care of themselves.  Ever since her divorce this past winter, X-tina has looked like a complete disaster.  She has gained a few extra pounds, but that doesn't stop her from wearing the same smaller size; the platinum blonde hair has gotten out of control; and she totally messed up the National Anthem last month during the Super Bowl.  I predict a full-blown Britney Spears' meltdown in the next several months. 

Last but not least, Kim K has debuted her first single, Jam.  Um, just because you have a reality TV show and may consider yourself an actress, it does not mean you can do anything.  Like sing.  This performance is akin to Kim Zolciak's Tardy for the Party.  I'm going to go even a little further and say that Tardy for the Party is better.  You won't miss anything if you don't check this out. 

No comments:

Post a Comment